A beautiful, silver haired, heavily re-touched 50 something looking model would dash across the screen...dressed in the latest "Country Club chic" outfit from Lacoste, toss her sassy grey hair to one side, look at the camera in a playful come-hither way and purr,
"I don't intend to grow old gracefully. I intend to fight it every step of the way."
She was actually far too fabulous and not nearly wrinkled enough. (To this day we are bombarded with images that could not be further from reality.) At the time, I thought growing old was some far off land...almost like a mirage...sort of there, but not really, and certainly nothing for teenager me to even consider. But the older I get, the more I can hear that catch phrase ringing in my ears.
Now, before we get too far gone, let me say this. I know that 43 is not really "old". My Dad is 83. That is old. And as much as I grumble about the aging process, I fully embrace the meme that I saw on Facebook not too long ago. (side note...if there was a 12 Step Program for Facebook, I would TOTALLY need to join that shit.) It said, "Old age is a privilege denied to many." Let that sink in for a minute. Boom! Right? So yes, I realize I should be grateful to grow old. And I do hope on some level that I am, one day, a sassy, grey haired, wrinkly old lady....still fabulous, but hella wrinkled. I am working to make peace with it.
When I was a sophomore in HS, I played one of the old lady sisters in "Arsenic and Old Lace." I was either Martha or Abby. I have no idea which. But it was great fun. And I remember doing the old age make-up every night to turn myself into this 70-80 year old gal. You know what? All of the wrinkles and fine lines that I DREW onto my face? Yeah...they're here. Slowly but surely making an appearance. And that is sort of a bummer.
I should also clarify that I got my wrinkles the "Old Fashioned Way"...."I EARNED THEM." (If you heard that in John Houseman's voice from the Smith Barney commercials of old, you are my favorite!) Seriously...tanning beds, smoking, actual sun, not enough sleep, far too much booze and drugs....yes, sadly it is all there on my face. Le sigh.
Now, my Mom was very into skin care and make up. She taught me well. I have been spending far too much money on all sorts of magical creams and potions to delay the aging process for many, many years. When I was single and made lots of money in Real Estate, I spent OBSCENE amounts of money on my skin. Now that I am Super Mom, I opt to pay the electric bill instead of buying a jar of La Mer. C'est la vie.
But, I still try to take care of my skin. Oh, how I love Ulta and Sephora! I always say that if I was independently wealthy, I would walk into a Sephora and just buy everything I could get my hands on. I mean, seriously. It makes me feel like the little girl with the stuffed unicorn in Despicable Me. "It's just so PRETTY!!"
All joking aside, there really is an overwhelming amount of skin care and make up designed with the "Over 40" set in mind. Some are good. Some are great! And, some aren't worth diddley squat.
I often spend my lunch break, cruising the aisles at Ulta, looking from one product to the next...always trying to figure out which one is going to actually do something for me without my having to take out a second mortgage. (My mother also taught me, "You get what you pay for". Thanks, Mom. This is true most of the time. Oh, but I did read once that according to the best dermatologists, plain old Oil of Olay is the best moisturizer you can buy.) Their labels say things like "anti-aging", "wrinkle-fighting", "line filling", "youth renewing"..etc. It all sounds so promising.
Anyway, I was at Ulta the other day, and I wandered into their hair care aisle. And do you know what I found? "Age-defying" shampoo and conditioner. And masks and treatments. Seriously. It's new. Made by Pantene. Says it fights the "7 signs of aging hair". I did not know there were 7 signs of aging hair. I read all 7. Freaking depressing. It's not enough that I am constantly being bombarded with a zillion different ways to make my skin look younger....Now you have to try and sell me something for my "Aging Hair?" WTF?
I know we all feel the pressure to look good. And when you begin to age, looking good is supposed to equal looking young. (and also thin, but I will write a whole separate post about body image another day!) I fully admit to succumbing to the pressure. I think it would be foolish to expect anyone to be completely immune to it. But, try to remember this. Old age really is a privilege denied to many. And the laugh lines on our faces only show the world we have lived joyful lives. By all means, take care of yourself and your skin. Drink more water. Get outside and move more. Eat more green vegetables. And learn to love what you see in the mirror! Try looking at yourself every day and saying, "You are beautiful and fabulous.!" It sounds so silly. But it really does make a difference. I promise. So go ahead and grow old gracefully! Be grateful. But definetly skip the “Old hair” shampoo.
